Memories, friendships, camaraderie. We expect these things from our relationships, whether personal, professional or family. The positive social karma builds over the years.

As a leader of a business, you get a few other perks, unless you totally screw it up. People look up to you, want to help you, and will always remember you as their “boss.” As I said, if you’re a crappy boss, or rude or negligent, they will have different memories, not so good ones –– but they’ll still remember you!

Your Social “Bank”

The concept of earning social credits for doing good things for others has been around for a long time; it’s what makes the world go ’round. In ancient times people gave trinkets to each other in appreciation, gifts, food and drinks. Many of the most important traditions that have been passed down through our generations have to do with friendship, giving, thoughtfulness.

The best way to build your social bank account is to give without expecting anything – it will come back to you eventually. Put good, quality information into the ecosystem, help people in areas where you have more experience, give advice, mentor, make introductions. It will all come back to you in multiples. But most people don’t do it that way, they can’t understand how magically life gives you things.

Isoo Kono

When I was a junior engineer right out of college, I had a boss who would do many extra things to help me, mentor me beyond the role of a supervisor. He took time outside of work to coach me in how to be a professional, how to travel for business, how to help others.

I was kind of amazed that he would do all this for me, and asked him why. He said that when he was starting, older people he worked with did the same for him. He was Japanese, and said it was the Japanese way of doing things. I asked if I could do anything for him, and he said, “Yeah, when you get older you can help young people just starting out.”

I took that advice to heart, and I’ve been trying to help others for my whole career.

I first learned about the unwritten social “banks” we add to and withdraw from when I was in primary school; we all did. It was a primitive form of negotiation, trading candy for bike rides. We learned at a young age, with our parents, siblings and the other kids at school. We quickly learned that there are several different types of friends and many types of negotiators.

Now there are many more ways to build our positive social karma, and we can do it on a mass scale, with so many social media networks. Linkedin is of course the #1 for business, and it’s a very strong one for me, bur there a many other awesome, supportive, growing networks. That’s the secret – find some off-linkedin networks very specific to you, or start your own.

Don’t Be An Opportunist

I have one relative that I only heard from once every year or less, and each time he would contact me to ask for something. There were no other communications, without an ask, just the requests for something. Sometimes he would try to sneak up on me, promising he didn’t want something, only to sneak in a request, usually for money.